Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to die on a cross than it is to die to myself. Not to belittle in anyway the brutality Jesus endured for us on the cross but sometimes it seems like it would be a lot easier for me to take up my cross and follow Jesus if somebody would just nail me to it. The sad fact is that I don’t really have a problem taking up my cross, I have a huge problem with laying it down. Denying myself, taking up my cross and following Jesus (Luke 9:23) is way too often traded in for indulging myself, crawling off my cross, and following my own selfish desires. Bottom line, I love Jesus with all my heart and I follow after him as hard as I can but I’m just not very good at it. The key is to not beat myself up for a week when I lay my cross down but confess my sin, climb back up on my cross as quickly as I can, and try again.
I doubt very seriously anybody is going to nail any of us to our crosses any time soon so we’re going to have to get better at getting back in the saddle every time we fall off. For that to happen takes a strength much greater than we have so we must daily not only take up our cross but also learn to live weak by daily recognizing our weakness, choosing to trust in God’s grace, and absolutely depending on God’s strength and not our own. We still have to climb back on but we are not alone, and never without help.
Hang in there!! – Runks