Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to die on a cross than it is to die to myself. Not to belittle in anyway the brutality Jesus endured for us on the cross but sometimes it seems like it would be a lot easier for me to take up my cross and follow Jesus if somebody would just nail me to it. The sad fact is that I don’t really have a problem taking up my cross, I have a huge problem with laying it down. Denying myself, taking up my cross and following Jesus (Luke 9:23) is way too often traded in for indulging myself, crawling off my cross, and following my own selfish desires. Bottom line, I love Jesus with all my heart and I follow after him as hard as I can but I’m just not very good at it. The key is to not beat myself up for a week when I lay my cross down but confess my sin, climb back up on my cross as quickly as I can, and try again.
I doubt very seriously anybody is going to nail any of us to our crosses any time soon so we’re going to have to get better at getting back in the saddle every time we fall off. For that to happen takes a strength much greater than we have so we must daily not only take up our cross but also learn to live weak by daily recognizing our weakness, choosing to trust in God’s grace, and absolutely depending on God’s strength and not our own. We still have to climb back on but we are not alone, and never without help.
My son Nick, aka @BigRunkDaddy in the twittosphere, and I are on our annual Thanksgiving week deer hunt. We’re sleeping in a ratty old camper, eating insanely unhealthy food, and having the time of our lives! It is one of the coolest blessings of my life that my 15 year old son wants to spend a week in the woods with his Dad.
Having a shared passion with your teenager is one of the greatest parenting tools any parent can have. It gives you the opportunity to have the “quantity” of time required to open the door for “quality” time to happen. I think the old adage, “quality time is more important than quantity time” is a load of bull because you can’t just decide to have quality time and magically make it happen. If you want to have quality time with your kids you have to make the effort to spend a ton of “quantity” time to get there. That’s why a shared passion is so important.
When I was a teenager I always thought my Dad was the biggest dork on the planet except when we were hunting together because we both loved it so much. Somwhere in the middle of all that “quantity” time in the woods the walls would come down and “quality” time happened. Some of the most important talks I ever had with my Dad during my crazy teen years took place over the hood of a pick-up in the middle of nowhere. Now I’m having that same experience all over again from the other side of the pick- up. As cool as I like to think I am I’m almost certain that Nick thinks I’m an idiot most of the time but when we’re out in the boonies sharing our passion for hunting I’m still his hero and that has opened the doors to some pretty awesome life changing conversations.
If I have any parenting advice to offer its this: include your kids in the passions of your life. Never leave them at home when you go do whatever it is you love to do. Figure out what they’re passionate about, get passionate about it, and get ready for some awesome, life changing experiences with your kids. Trust me, it is so worth the effort for them and you!!
Now, I’ve got to get out of this deer blind and go help Nick clean the hog he just shot. Maybe we’ll get to have a talk about life while we’re at it.
I’m sitting on an airplane with my 6’6” totem pole body crammed into a regular, no leg room, non-exit row, teeny, tiny airplane seat. I’m sitting next to a guy who is also circus freak tall and we’re both cramped, crunched, and fighting for leg and elbow room like sardines in a tiny can but at least we’re not alone! I don’t think there is anything more encouraging than knowing that whatever you’re facing somebody has either been there or is there right now and feels your pain. I think the most comforting words in the English language are, “Me Too” because those words scream out “YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!” My 94 year old grandmother, Maw-Maw, would put it this way,
“A burden shared is a burden halved and a burden born alone is a burden doubled.”
The problem is not so much finding someone who has been where you are but finding someone with the guts to be real enough to admit it. Sadly this is especially true in the church where often times rather than helping our wounded we shoot them and that has got to stop! I say its time we take off our masks and stop pretending we’ve got it all together. We need to start being real and transparent about who we are and what we’re struggling with so we can make it safe for others to do the same and hopefully all get better together. I’ll go first. To those who have faced the horrors of childhood sexual abuse I say, “ Me Too.” To those who have had their butts kicked by an addiction I say, “ Me Too.” To those who are fighting through the 12 steps trying to get well I say, “Me Too.” To those who have been beat down by the reality of depression I say, “Me Too.” To those who struggle to let Jesus take control I say, “Me Too.” To those who are sick of going to church and pretending everything is fine when its not I say, “Me Too.” To those who have feared that if people really knew you they wouldn’t love you I say, “Me Too” To those who battle insecurity I say, “Me Too.” To those who just want to be loved and accepted, warts and all I say, “Me Too.” To all the broken, hurting, and struggling people I say, “you are not alone. You have never been alone!” Somebody, including Jesus, Heb 4:15, has been where you are and you do not have to suffer alone!!! So let’s take off our masks, get real with each other and with God and start saying “Me too” as loudly and as often as we can!
The song in the video – “Ask Me” by Amy Grant has served as an incredible sense of encouragement and hope to me in my recovery from childhood sexual abuse. I cannot tell you how many times I have listened to it, over and over again, celebrating the hope and freedom Jesus has brought [...]
Youth Revivals, hmmm, does anybody really do those anymore? Do they still work? Will students really invite their friends to one? Yes, Yes, and Yes! I know in a lot of youth ministry circles the youth revival is thought of as just another dinosaur of youth ministry programming but I beg to differ. I do [...]
We live in a society that tells us we need to be independent and self-sufficient, pull ourselves up by our boot-straps (whatever that means??), and do everything in our own strength. It sounds good on the surface but in reality it is so contrary to the way scripture says we are to live our lives.
II [...]
I had pretty major shoulder surgery back in December and had my arm stuck in a dang sling for 6 weeks! It was horrible! It was my right arm and I’m right handed so I had to do everything with my left hand! And I mean, EVERTHING! Use your imagination. It was [...]
Funny guy with a Deep message?? Is that even possible? Can anybody really be funny and at the same time really have something valuable to say?? Apparently a lot of people don’t think so. I’ve heard a ton of Youth Ministers say that they’re not big fans of “funny speakers” because most funny speakers are [...]
Check out this crazy video I made on the way to The Texas Youth Minister’s Conclave about the evils of self-promotion, bad driving, funny word choices, and why I do what I do. Have fun.
